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...The Cheese Wants YOU!

Calling Guest Reviewers!

Would you like to review a gig, a CD, a cinema release or a DVD? The Cheese is magnanimous enough to give you that chance. Simply contact The Cheese and he'll post your review with your name on it. Wonderous.

Visit the Recruitment Page here.


Your Comments:

"Your site looks like vomit and when i go on it, it looks like vomit... "

- Ryan 'Tiz'.
via email

Quote of the moment:

"If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank." ~ Woody Allen

Hero of 2006:

George Clooney George Clooney - eatmycheeseplease.co.uk's Hero of 2006

When Gorgeous George finally gets both the critical and commercial success he deserves, what does he do? Smile a lot like Tom Cruise? No. He uses his A-List status and intelligence to turn around and kicks his government in the ass, both personally and on-screen, winning an Oscar for Syriana and gets a nominated for Best Director for Good Night, And Good Luck. George Clooney… The Cheese salutes you.

Strange Fact:
In March 2007, Denzel Washington is expected to make a full public apology for being one of the most irritating actors in the world. The penitent actor is also expected to undertake over 3000 hours community service for his crimes frequent crimes against audiences.

Writer / Reviewer Recruitment

The Cheese
"I remember my first job as a writer. It was providing reviews for a company that sold cats. I gave a 5/5 rating for a cat that only had one leg, just to be nice, you know? They fired me soon after.."
- The Cheese
Reviewer Recruitment...

 

Are you a fan of music and/or film? Do you have an opinion on such matters? Are you able to type on a computer and have a basic grasp of spelling and grammar? Then The Cheese Want YOU!

The Cheese is looking for fellow music and film aficionados who are willing to contribute to eatmycheeseplease.co.uk; writing reviews on a latest album, single, dvd or cinema release.

If you think you’re capable of telling people across the world why the latest Michael Bay film is an affront to cinematic decency, or why the latest Radiohead album is unmitigated genius (or vice versa) in an unbiased, knowledgeable and perhaps humorous way, then eatmycheeseplease.co.uk could be your yellowy ticket to fame, fortune and spiritual enlightenment. (Note: fame, fortune and spiritual enlightenment not guaranteed).

"I once wrote a brief review for eatmycheeseplease.co.uk, after it was published I found that my love life had improved ten-fold and that old women no longer spat on me in the streets. I thank YOU eatmycheeseplease.co.uk" - Tom Cruise

As eatmycheeseplease.co.uk’s journalistic beacon is an eccentric and diverse one; you can write a review on anything from a Louis Malle box set to the latest Limp Bizkit album (or did they split up? Hmm.) Simply contact The Cheese and tell him you’d like to write a few hundred words on a single, album, dvd or cinema release of your choice and he’ll be delighted to discuss it with you.

Your review will - of course, be adorned with your name to show people how intelligent and amazing you are, and will even provide a link to your own website / profile if you specify.